Do Positive People Ever Have A Bad Day?
Have you ever felt when listening to a motivational speaker or reading a self-help book that "Oh, this all sounds so good, but it is so hard for me. I wish I could be like him/her, and take all stumbling blocks in life like a piece of cake." And no matter how hard you try, after being all happy and positive and optimistic about the future for a few days, you just find yourself all sad and depressed again. Yet again.
No, it only happens to me. I cannot stay positive all the time. The problem must be with me. All these positive people make life seem like a play, but I just cannot keep up being positive and happy. I always fall back to being sad and depressed. Not another bad day.
These could be your words.
And you know what? You are not alone. You are not the only one thinking this way. But there is no reason for beating yourself up. Let me tell you a secret: positive people do have bad days. Just like everyone else. They may find it easier to get over stumbling blocks in life but it all depends on life experience and mindset. And your mindset can change.
Allow Yourself to Feel Your Feelings
It all depends on how determined you are to make your life better. Because that is all that matters. Everything else takes time. You have to be patient. The most important is your will. Are you ready to look at your life from another perspective? And from another level? Then here are the steps you can follow:
- Accept that you are having a bad day. A bad day doesn't always mean that your whole day is messed up. Sometimes (or often?) we only make a big fuss out of tiny things. So just stop and think for a while. Is this thing worth worrying about it? Or even thinking about it? Can it really ruin your day? Your life won't get better and the problem won't solve itself either if you are worrying.
- If it's just a tiny thing you better figure out how to feel better instead of constantly thinking about it. Concentrate on something else - live the very moment of what you are currently doing to the fullest. Everything else can wait.
- If nothing else helps, let yourself be just sad. Feel the feeling to the fullest. Just feel how sad the whole thing is! Cry if you want to. Scream if you want to. Let the sadness develop in you. Don't ever feel ashamed. It is much better to let your feelings out than to keep them inside. They will only sit on your chest and harm you. If you choose to feel the sadness instead of fighting, you will feel better more quickly afterwards. Don't ever be afraid of your feelings.
- Don't think it's only you who feel this way. Sometimes we need to get worse in order to get better. This just how it is. Even the most positive people have a bad day. It's true!
Once you are having a bad day, you can think of ways to get the best out of it. Do I need to tell you that the reason for writing this article was that I was down in the dumps? But I thought I could make use of that. Many of my friends keep telling me that they look upon me because I am such a positive and strong person and everything seems so easy for me. Sometimes it feels like they are ashamed when telling me about how hard they find it to get through an awkward situation, for example. Like they think it I could handle a situation like that as if it was an absolute breeze.
So I thought while having a bad day I would just use it for showing them that you can learn something from every single thing in life. Even from a bad day. And without bad days we wouldn't appreciate good days, right? Without Yin there is no Yang. Without bad there is not good. Without night there is no day. Sometimes you need to know where you stand and analyze the situation. Because even a bad day can help you grow.
Written by Andi July 21, 2010
*Photo by Nicolas Raymond
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